Voicenotes & Anxiety, L+A

•Lucia learnt to play the piano when she was a kid with her mum.

•Andrew sees it as a safe place. He can focus on the music she creates, no bad memories, no expectations from anyone, not having to deal with all the problems she has, just her and the piano.

•Playing was her way to run away from reality, even if it was just for a short period of reprieve.

•It was also a secret he liked to keep for himself. Andrew could never describe what he feels when Lucia’s playing.

•She only played for her mum, until Andrew came.

•Andrew was different from anyone else: Lucia felt she could trust him this part of him she fought so much to hide. It was his vulnerable side. The reason was simple: it showed so many feelings when she played. Trusting him with her music would mean destroy the image she worked so hard on building to show the real Lucia. The Lucia she put so much effort to hide from everyone.

•And that was so freaking scary. But she felt she could do it, she could be herself with Andrew. Even though she hadn’t known him for a long time.

•After getting together, there are more times where Lucia plays the piano for him.

•She tried to teach him the basic stuff. Those days, Andrew sat on the piano bench while Lucia sat on his lap. She took Andrew’s hands, trying to guide him through the keys…but Andrew was a mess when he listened to Lucia. And she was so close to him. Two things she would never get used to.

•Andrew ended up with his face buried in Lucia’ neck while soft happy sighs left her mouth. It was almost impossible for Lucia to focus.

•Andrew loves so much to listen to her, not only because Lucia is extremely talented. Her boyfriend looks so calm and carefree on those moments. He has this little smile too that only appears when she plays. Andrew could never feel tired of watching her in those moments. It was kinda magical if you asked him.

•But the piano is not a safe place just for Lucia anymore: it also helped Andrew when he felt like everything was about to fall apart. He had a folder on his phone with voice notes of Lucia playing: sometimes her boyfriend sent them to her while she was at work because “Drew, I was playing this song and it reminded me of you” or “I was thinking of you while playing and I ended up composing this”.

•Andrew had those voice notes as one of the most precious things. They were one of the ways Lucia had to show how much she loved him.

•It’s not a secret that some nights Andrew can’t sleep. His thoughts attacked him, and it becomes too much to handle, too many things to ignore and fall asleep. His only option is staying awake until his mind goes back to calm times.

•Sometimes Lucia is awake with him and does her best to calm him down. And it helps Andrew a lot: Lucia’s reassuring words, whispered on the quiet of the night, hands running through his hair and back, and soft kisses on his forehead and shoulders seem to be the perfect way to shut down his thoughts.

•When Lucia is sleeping during those moments, he doesn’t have the heart to wake her up. He knows how much his girl struggles to fall asleep.

•That’s why he always has his earphones close to their bed. Maybe Lucia wasn’t awake to calm him down, but he had a part of Lucia there with him: his voicenotes~ Lucia playing the piano.

•Andrew doesn’t know how to explain it, but all those pieces played by Lucia had the power of making his thoughts go away, leaving him sleepy and calm.

•It became a routine for him without realising.

•Lucia’ eyes shine when his boyfriend explains to her and suggest to maybe put the voice notes out loud so they both could listen to them.

•Lucia holds him closer and without realising what she’s doing, she starts moving her fingertips through Andrew’s back as if he was playing the song. And Andrew falls asleep immediately with it.

•Since that moment, Lucia uses it to reassure Andrew and calm him down. And it’s one of Andrew’s favourite things.

Andrew suffers from severe anxiety attacks, and Lucia is his calm, his support.

Let me know your thoughts about this piece.

~ Pia.


17 thoughts on “Voicenotes & Anxiety, L+A

  1. They both are just soo romantically naive, isn’t this is a kind of love this worlds need. Andrew knew how lucia felt ,lucia knew how andrew felt. They both could see each other inside out, without even speaking at all. Guess those voice helped Andrew soo much.just like another home to him, after lucia’s arm❤️.damn if you have a book, please let me know. i might not be luckies as those who got their first love but i can be lucky enough to read your words. I hope it helps remembering who i am❤️🌸

    Liked by 2 people

    1. It is really amazing to know what is beyond the obvious intimacy. There is something sweet and mesmerizing in these gentle and subtle touches. 😊

      Thank you so much for appreciating, it made my day. Means a lot to me 🌻


  2. I loved it me nd my partner have similliar story but not with piano with familybissues and other fear, anxieties ,loneliness, me being a real me nd not that girl which was made for world not because i was not proud of myself but coz of the people surrounded me for a bit of a reason i never wanted them to leave or judge and say oh u r these go the hell screw up kinda.. Nd i use to stay acc coz of they feel good around me nd need me when they are in jeopardy nd then on either side family rrlations were eating me up even though in between i stopped showing my sorrows my flaws my sadness pain hurt nd i started builduing persnality like if u love me this way have it i can be good with unless u judge me aprt from ur persnal issues to me nd by yhe time i turned teen i just became an arrogant attitude girl yet softhearted good will hearted tough hollow trusted anyone having addictions not in big amount but occasionally nd then trusted two guys nd broke my heart nd that to with only fault of trusting them else everyfault was thier not going deep but i dint do a single thing that would hurt them persnally physically mentally nd i got in retuen was devasting me.. Not only that my childhood friends betrayed me used mah money mah care my helps my emotions nd still for some bfs they left me handless. Then when it was least expected a guy entered into my life suddenly coz of situation we got to do the same job he was hating me coz of my image that got built in those days which eventually was made upbin all thier minds due to public half passed truths nd my behaviour that was not gotgiving a fuck abt thier mentalities nd not worrying abt what they think whoch in my eyes was right but in all thier eyes was kinky cheap reckless and somekinda authentic bastard would do so idk y i never hurted anyone unless they did wrong to me that in equal amount not more or less nd then he stayed with me he got my things my way he stated everything i use to think this but oh u r not that but he had past of three girls one with extreme commitment nd the other in choice currently going altogether nd to add up more i started that someone finally got me ik by judging by abusing by passing comments but it changed nd thus i started liking him but i was fightijg with myself he is aldready into two of them i dont have any chance i fought like dc u cant do this u ill get hurt if u ho he is not yours nd all laye night sleeps forcing hik to talk to me for hour nd all but i ended up convinicng to spend tike with me he got to knw me i got have his habit then things went like a trip came nd we got closer but the other two got thier places one in dustbin nd one with like prokises i will make u wife n all nd i was there sitting seeing all this holding his hand crying for him as i saw he getting betrayed nd the other in fesr wether she can make up to him on his terms nd the same night i realised no men enough i do like him nd thats aldready done it cannot be undone or reversed then i decided to change my city i thought i ll end up fogetting him then my bro which was not blood bro but i respected him much his decsions who was his best friend too nd on his saying i stopped until then the one i liked action spokes that he cant live coz for everylittle thing he has to asl where is dc even in drunk moments nd i was always there from removing his shoes to comb his hair to swap his entire look too be there when he is hungry amgry sad crying bizy lazy cute work every fucking where then for some time what comes to me u stay away as i expressed my feelings that i liked him n all i brokeup but i dint change towards him nd that may be got striked the both of them left him nd i was there standing so he chose me his world had diffrent judgements of being a girl perfect to his family thinkings i changed almost u knw 140 percent of my sites out of 100 yes completely just coz it was his family nd that only way to have my place in his life i m happy with him he is angry on my past we have trust issues he gets wild sometimes n all gets brutal on amger hits me sometimes i left my home nd everything for few days for him to be with him as i was missing him we met my birthday came he celebrated it which was not done in last 20 years then again trust issues his anher temper all got into us but we are not falling apart… Nd would go on…i told this story bcoz i think u can write it in better way i hope if u write it do send it to me nd mention me.. Dhruvi chovatia nd there is much more ij btween how he supported me allowed me to be the real dhruvi which i left years ago to again be that finally someone will be there to notice me whther i have had food or not or whther i m okay nd dont have to drive home with one eye operation three times alone or pass three months on hosp bed without having anybody on side including parents not coming to see by nd only finger countable peoppe to meet up nd now finally having someone wherr i can lay on him nd have sukooooon someone is finally my own…

    Liked by 1 person

  3. This I think shows how the anxiety the two have is solved by being with each other. Andrew especially needs the music notes from Lucia to go to sleep or just to relax. I like the idea that yes music does calm our inner senses. I have always believed music is food for the soul. Thus, the calming affect as you have pointed out so neatly.

    Liked by 2 people

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